I always remind my self that i am 17 years old. I know is weird but i do it. every time at some random moments i tell my self "i am 17" "i am 17". I want to cherish this moment right now, this year (that is almost over) I want to make the best of my life and the time i have there on earth.
Time go by so quickly and i feel like every year we have less time. Since i was Little i have been very conscious of time and have always try to remember very well how i felt at some season of my life. Looking at my life right now and how i see life, it's very different at how i saw it years ago.
Yesterday we went to have dinner at a friend house and the theme come up at how my parents decided to homeschooled us. My mom start telling the story, and so many emotions were awakened in my heart, nostalgic for knowing that is all gonna be over in less that a month and all we are gonna have is memories (the best memories ever). Happy to know that we have accomplish our goal. Thankful for so so so many things, like for my parents for giving up there time and teaching us everything, for God's wisdom in my parents, for having my sisters right there with me, for the people how has support us. Ashamed, for at some time being so foolish and treating my mother so bad, for not being grateful, for being so disobedient at times... and all i could say is that through  all that THE LORD HAS BEEN THERE WITH US and that HE IS THE SAME. All i wanted to do at that time was cry, cry, and cry....looking back at all those times and different seasons, and knowing that the Lord was there, right there with my mom, with Anna, with Enid, with my dad and with me, teaching  us all different things and equipping us for our different tasks. The Lord has, is, and will always be good, and I'm grateful for that. But then comes the future.
The future scars me, makes me happy, excited, nerves and insecure.
I'm afraid of not been good, of not being quite prepare for life, nerves of what people would think of me, happy for the new people i will meet, for the new thing i will learned and experience, insecure of not knowing, of myself, of my personality.
I read this verse this week with tears on my eyes and it gave me peace that passes all understanding. So much love in there.
Because God has said, “Never will I leave you;
    never will I forsake you.” Hebrews 13:5

I believe the King of Kings create me, and thought of me since the beginning of the creation, he knows me butter that i know myself, he knows how i feel and my straggles, and i know He has a perfect purpose in my life and that He will be with me through  it all.

How ever is reading this, let me tall you "trust in the Lord, He will never leave you because He created you, yes YOU!  and He loves you so so much, i can not even tell you how much, because i can not even understand it, no one can, He sent his only son to die for you, to forgive all of your sins and rise again so you could have eternal life.
Leave your fear behind and trust and have faith in Him."
xoxo Andrea.

No comments:

Post a Comment